Misty sells her soul to the Magikarp
by Dancing Mask
Summary: Misty considers selling her soul for more water pokemon, with comedic results. Will she really go through with it?


Disclaimer: Pokemon was never mine, although I did make some sweet-ass made-up pokemon when I was little. But yeah, rights go to Nintendo.

**Misty sells her soul to the Magikarp**

Misty moped, staring at her pokeballs. She'd lost another cascade badge… being the sole gym leader of Cerulean City was tougher than she thought. But she couldn't go find some new pokemon- there was no one to watch the gym.

"I'd sell my soul for some new water pokemon." She sighed…

With a subtle poof of smoke, a magikarp appeared, with a curly moustache and a top hat.

"You called?"

"Wha… Ack! No, not my soul for a magikarp! I didn't mean that!"

"Well that's offensive…" The Magikarp floated higher, until it was face height with Misty. She shrank backwards, sweat drops appearing on the back of her head.

"I was never going to give myself to you anyway. I was merely going to make you a deal."

"Wait, YOU'RE going to take my soul? That would mean… but you're a magikarp…"

"Magikarp's can have powers! Lots of them! This is merely… a ruse." The magikarp twirled its thin moustache, going for a cunning look.

"So… how many pokemon could I have? If I did sell my soul, I mean." Misty asked, not entirely convinced yet. But it WAS a water pokemon offering her, and they were all so cute… yes, even Gyarados…

"One of every kind of water pokemon that has ever been discovered!" The magikarp boomed, voice echoing like a bad movie effect. He assumed it impressed her, when she reacted positively. Take note, would have to use the echo again in the future.

Misty clapped her hands together, thinking about the water pokemon she would control…

"Even Lugia and Kyogre and Suicune?"

"Well… no."

"But, but-"

"They're already taken…" The floating fish didn't add that they could beat the crap out of him if he ever tried to sell them off to a human.

"Still, it's a mighty fine offer, no? All high level, knowing a wide variety of moves…Thiiiiiiiiiiink about it!"

Misty wished he'd shut up, the light effects springing around the fish were getting annoying too. She tried to concentrate on the offer. Think, girl, think…

"What exactly would selling my soul involve?"

"Oh? Barely anything at all, these days!" _Especially since that bastard kept his operation down_

"You could still go up when you die, depending on your actions, and I can only call on you for a favour once during your life." _Any more favours and he'd feel it in the morning, thanks to that stupid almighty_

"Hmm. Tempting…" Misty sat down, feet dangling in the water of the pool.

"What else would happen?"

"Oh, just a few old rules, from ye olde times." The magikarp said dismissively, attempting to polish a monocle with his flipper.

"Like what?" Misty narrowed her eyes. No way would she let him skip the fine print of this deal, when her soul was at stake.

"Hmm… let's see:" A yellowed scroll appeared in front of him, as he began to read.

"Your hair shall be dyed a deeper red than the fires of the setting sun, well, no problem there."

"Go on."

"You shall be incapable of feeling another's love for one year, well, also no problem-" The fish was cut short, as Misty whacked him hard.

"What's that supposed to mean!?"

"Oh come on! You and Ash travelled together for HOW many episode, uh, weeks, and never anything! Not even one date, with all of those perfect opportunities!"

"And how would you know this…?" Misty folded her arms, glaring at him.

"That's not important." The magikarp tried to look cool, leaning against a pole nearby, only to look like he was having trouble staying in mid air. Again.

"Just hurry on with the list, damn you."

"Let's see… For one week after the deal, all food shall taste like ash to your tongue. Heh, not that'd you mind if it did, am I right?"

"Stop that!" Misty whacked him again, the magikarp starting to gain bruises along his head. The fine top hat fell off as well, disappearing into smoke as it did.

"Sorry. A-hem. That's the last of it."

Misty crossed her arms, thinking. The food thing was no big deal, it would just reinforce her current diet. The love thing… well, she was planning on being completely accomplished and impressive by the time she met him anyway, a year to focus on her gym-leader duties couldn't hurt…

"Alright, I guess you've got a deal."

"Excellent, just sign here." A big-ass contract appeared in front of them, along with a pen. Misty scribbled around for a little, trying to get the pen to run, eventually giving up and switching to the black pen. Then, it was signed!

Ever water pokemon would be hers…

"Oh, and sliding doors won't open for you." The magikarp coughed, as he started to dissipate.

"Wait, what? Come back here!" Misty grabbed the fish, slamming it to the ground.

"Are you serious?" She held it threateningly close, as pokeballs appeared on the ground behind her.

"Well, yes. Nearly forgot about that one, such a small detail…" The magikarp laughed nervously.

"Take it back! I want doors to recognise me!"

"Are you for real? It's such a trivial thing-"

"I said, the deals off!" Misty's face turned red with anger, as the Magikarp quivered. The pokeballs disappeared, as he did as she asked, sighing.

_Always the deal-breaker… Why does everyone always back out when they hear the door-thing?_

As the magikarp departed, Misty grinned, her tongue stuck out… in her other hand, she had managed to grab a lapras, a sharpedo, and even a kingdra… Not a bad deal at all.

A/N: An idea that hit me in the shower, and seemed to write itself. Let me know what you think, constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.


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